APH meets OHSHC
by british-otaku
Summary: Fail title is fail. New collab. story. What if the countries met the Host club? Hilarity and chaos ensue. Disclaimer: I don't own it! My friend Ivy Lilly Malfoy Snape is also posting it!
1. Chapter 1

Title

-In the World Conference: Arctic Circle, Some time (why would we know?!)-

~Discussing random stuff about the London Olympics~

"I apologize in advance for any security issues we may have. We are working on fixing it now." England began.

The Ouran host club was **not **originally planning on taking a vacation in the Arctic. However, Tamaki wanted to see two things in the Arctic: the Northern Lights and penguins (there are no penguins in the Arctic).

Presently, Haruhi was running away from the host club, more specifically, Tamaki. The reason: "Haruhi, you need to wear this eskimo dress! You'd look so cute in it!"

"I don't wear dresses, and that dress is no exception!"

So Haruhi ran into a random building, and burst into a room. Tamaki runs in after her yelling, "Haruhi!" loudly and annoyingly (AN: like America!) and death hugs and twirls her around. The remaining host club members ran in after them and Mori pried Haruhi out of Tamaki's grip. Then Honey asked, "Are you okay, Haru-chan?" Then they noticed the other group. Cue awkward silence. The two groups stared at each other.

Tamaki walked over to Liechtenstein and began flirting with her, flourishing a rose he pulled out of nowhere. Switzerland aimed his gun at Tamaki's face, glaring. Tamaki just stood there. The twins dragged Tamaki away. "Bloody hell, there's another France…"

"Yes, I'm half French," Tamaki replied, missing the point. France…er...laughed.

"Oh honhonhonhon, maybe we can team up to spread love to-"

"Oh no you don't, you bloody frog!"

"Yes I will, black sheep of Europe!"

"Why you-" Pretty soon the two were at each other's throats like usual. Meanwhile, Hikaru and Kaoru were scheming about how to prank their newest target, Italy.

"Hey, you!"

Italy looked up from his drawing (he knew he should have been taking notes on the meeting, but still…) to see the twins pointing at him. He looked up.

The identical twins smirked. "Want to play a game?"

Italy beamed. "Ve~, I like games! Yeah, let's play!"

"All right," the twins donned hats and posed identically. "Let's play the 'Which one is Hikaru game!'"

Italy stared at the synchronized boys in wonder. "Ve~ how do I play?"

"You just have to guess…" one of them started,

"…which one is Hikaru!" the other finished.

"Oh, okay! Um…um... uh…" Italy started to panic. "Um…uh…him!" He pointed to the one on the right.

"Uh oh, you got it wrong~!" the twins sing-songed. They laughed, "Try again!"

Italy, noticing that they did not switch positions, beamed. "Oh, so it's you!"

"Uh oh, you got it wrong~!" the twins sang. They started to ROFL at Italy.

"Wh-what?" Italy's eyes welled up with tears, which started to spill over onto his cheeks.

Across the room, Romano was warding off Spain. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed his fratello sobbing and two twins laughing over him. He immediately got angry.

"What do you think you bastards are doing to my fratello!" he yelled running towards them.

Hikaru and Kaoru cocked their heads. "Fratello?"

But before they could ponder things further, Kaoru got a head-butt to the stomach, courtesy of Romano.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru cried, running over to his twin. (Please, notice that if you have never seen the 'Brotherly Love' they share, watch the show. It will all make sense. Somewhat.)

Faces one inch apart from each other's, Hikaru over Kaoru, Kaoru's tears dripping from his face, Hikaru asked, "Kaoru! Are you ok!?"

Romano and Italy (who still has tears running down his face) watch the twins, confused, while listening to the random dramatic music that suddenly started playing. Romano's face settles into its usual scowl. "What the hell? Are you twin bastards homos or something?" Cue (rather loud) record scratch.

Haruhi walked by. "Yes."

Hikaru and Kaoru and Romano blinked. "Che," Romano commented. "The twin bastards really are pathetic, aren't they?"

Hikaru yelled and tackled Romano, which started a 'small' scuffle. The fighters managed to not only punch and kick each other, but the managed to throw random objects, including the cups of water resting on the meeting table. As you may guess, not all of the projectiles hit their intended targets. Meaning, some hit other nations, which resulted in other fights. For example, an eraser would sail and hit Turkey on the side of his head, Turkey would think Greece threw it, Greece yells at Turkey, Turkey yells back, the yelling match starts, Japan tries in vain to stop it. The fact that England and France are fighting in almost the exact same way doesn't help either.

While these events are taking place, Tamaki spots Ukraine-or Ukraine's chest. He immediately begins flirting with her. Ukraine feels abashed yet uncomfortable, and it showed on her face.

Suddenly, the temperature of the room dropped at least ten degrees. Russia appeared behind Tamaki, creepy aura, pickax, faucet pipe, and all.

"You should stay away from my older sister, da?"

Tamaki paled. "Ah…I'm sure that this is one big misunderstand-" he bolted, and unfortunately, Russia was right behind, weapons at the ready. Tamaki runs and hides behind Kyoya. "Help me!"

Kyoya simply walked to the other side of Germany and resumed their conversation about how stupid and idiotic some of their acquaintances are (i.e. Tamaki). Tamaki kept running and he also sneezed once or twice (or ten times…).

Honey and Mori were chatting, or rather Honey was rambling and Mori was quietly listening, when Finland walked up to Honey "Hello, what's your name? Mine's….Tino!"

"HI I'M HONEY AND I LIKE CAKE DO YOU LIKE CAKE I HAVE CHOCOLATE AND STRAWBERRY AND VANILLA AND MORE CHOCOLATE AND CHOCOLATE WITH STRAWBERRIES ON TOP. Do you want some cake?"

Finland smiled. "I'll have the vanilla cake then."

As Finland and Honey bonded over cake, Sweden and Mori stood next to each other, watching their charges. Mori turned to Sweden. "Hi."

"Hi."

"…hi," Mori replied.

"Hi!" Finland interjected.

"EYERONE SHUT UP!" Germany yelled. Kyoya looked at Germany with an expression that said "That was my** ear**". Germany's rant continued. Everyone stopped (including Russia, letting Tamaki run away). The rant went on for 5 more minutes.

"No accents," Mori commented. Cue another loud record scratch. Every country froze.

"Really, let's elect someone to see if all of the accents left." Everyone stared. "Wait…what?" Japan said. Italy exclaimed.

"Doitsu, where are or accents?"

"Why did he call him Germany?" Haruhi inquired. China replied.

"Oh, it's only a nickname." He blinked, missing the "aru".

"Well, what kind of nation doesn't go by their name?" America asked. All of the Allies whacked the back of his head. Except Russia, he just kol'ed. Honey blinked.

"Why did he say nation?" he asked.

"Well," England sighed, "we are personifications of the Axis Powers, Allied Forces, and a bunch of other countries. Hence the confusion over the dropped accents."

"Oh. So, who's who?"

"I'M THE HERO!" came from across the room.

"Shut up America!" England yelled back. Germany sighed.

"Ask as you walk around, it's back to chaos." Honey nodded, smiling. "Wait, why are you here?"

"Tamaki wanted to see the Northern Lights and penguins," Kyoya answered. Canada walked up to Tamaki.

"There are no penguins here." Tamaki didn't hear him.

"Who are you?" asked Kumajirou.

"I'm Canada." Russia explained.

"There are no penguins in the Arctic." Naturally, Tamaki emo-cornered. From his emo-corner, he looked up at Kyoya with puppy-dog eyes and stammered, "But-but Kyoya, you-you-you- penguins!"

Kyoya looked up from his black notebook at Tamaki with an amused look and said, "Tamaki, I told you no such thing."

~CUE KYOYA FLASHBACK~

The Host Club was sitting in "abandoned" music room three at Ouran Academy. Honey was napping, Mori watching Honey, Haruhi was doing her math homework, Kyoya was writing (as usual) in his black notebook, and the twins were…. playing tick-tack-toe? Anyway….

Tamaki was sitting in a chair, looking out the window, bored with no idea of what he was going to waste his summer doing. He wanted a Host Club field trip again (Meaning he did not want to leave Haruhi…). Suddenly, he bolted upright in his chair and leapt out of it, running over to the table where Kyoya was sitting, all alone, set off from the world (his normal).

"Mommy, I have the perfect idea for a family vacation. Including the neighbors!" Tamaki cried. (AN: Tamaki's "family setting" is: Kyoya; mom, Tamaki; dad, Haruhi; daughter, Hikaru and Kaoru; sons, Honey and Mori; cousins/ neighbors.)

"Oh really, Daddy? Where might this trip be?" Kyoya asked, not looking up, secretly thinking, _and how much is it going to cost THIS time?_

"The Arctic Circle!" Tamaki cried happily.

Kyoya looked up at Tamaki. He made the mistake of asking, "And _why_ would the Host Club be taking our _summer_ vacation in the _Arctic_ circle?"

"Because it is the PERFECT place to be! I mean, it has the northern light, and PENGUINS!" Tamaki cried loudly.

"Boss, are you TRYING to wake up Honey?" Hikaru and Kaoru asked simultaneously, making Tamaki quiet down a decimal.

"But Tamaki, the Aurora Borealis, aka Northern Lights, are only in the winter, and besides, there are no-" he sighed loudly, pushing his glasses up tiredly. "Oh, alright. To the Arctic we shall go."

~END KYOYA FLASHBACK~

"So, no, there are no penguins in the Arctic." Tamaki just sat in his emo corner.

"Well, the awesome me will-"

"Do nothing," Germany interjected. "Stay here, and don't cause trouble. (Ironically, Germany is the younger brother.)

"But-"

"No. Or I will set Russia after you." Prussia (if you couldn't tell…) went and emo-cornered next to Tamaki. They had a short discussion.

"The awesome me has a new friend for our trio!" France sighed.

"Well, now we're not a trio."

"Ahem, accents?" England interjected.

"Allow me to break the fourth wall," Kyoya began (it happens in Hetalia. It's legit), "the authors were tired of attempting to write your accents but will bring them back next chapter." The countries sighed and muttered amongst themselves. "Well Tamaki, if there are no penguins and no Northern Lights, we need to go." The host club grouped back by the door. "Thank you for not kicking us out," Kyoya said as they left.

"Ouran…academy?" Japan said.

"Can we visit? Please?" America said. France nodded.

"If we go to Japan…"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

-World Meeting: Tokyo, some time later (who cares?)-

"Now what?"

The twins were carefully selecting costumes for the Host club. "How about…this?"

"No," Haruhi replied.

"This?"

"No."

"This?"

"…it's still no." Haruhi spotted a Japan costume and grabbed it. "I'll wear this." Then she ran off to change.

Tamaki twirls around to face the twins, his cloak (Like France. AN: "This is war! And you're wearing a cape!" Sorry, had to.) billowing out around him. "Where's Haruhi?"

"She went to go change…into Japan."

"Why didn't she wear…this?" he said, whipping out a Seychelles outfit. The twins blinked.

"Well, that's anticlimactic," they said in unison. Tamaki looked down, shocked, and threw the outfit back into the large box of costumes.

[Who's who:

Tamaki=France

Haruhi=Japan

Kyoya=Germany

Hikaru=Romano

Kaoru=Italy

Honey=Finland

Mori=Sweden]

Tamaki continued twirling…twirling…so interested by his cloak that he…CRASHED into a wall.

"You ok, Boss?" the twins asked, not really caring. Then they started to laugh.

"They do go here, right?" America asked. The countries had been wandering around for a while and still hadn't found the host club. Everyone looked at Japan.

"The one room we haven't checked is "abandoned" music room 3."

"Let's go there then!" America said, running towards the door. Italy passed him, Germany in tow. Then he pulled the door open. Cue flood of roses (which buried poor Sealand).

"Welcome." (If you haven't seen this before, go find an episode and watch it, like episode 1). The countries walked in.

"I wonder how Austria's doing…" Germany said to himself.

"Why don't you ask him?" Italy asked, pointing at Austria, who was playing a piano (not in the ocean this time).

"How did I not see him?! Again?!" Germany yelled, causing all of the girls to look at him and rush over. He stood there, confused. The other countries walked in, following the piano music and the yelling.

"Hahaha, Germany has fangirls!" Half of them ran over to America after he said that. England was running from them with Japan and a few other countries. Germany walked over to Kyoya and sat down. France and Tamaki saw each other and began to talk about hosting (what else?). (France had been right behind Italy in getting to the club, hence the fact that he was already there). The countries dispersed after the initial shock of (fan)girls and talk to the hosts they had conversations with before. This time, however, Japan talked to Haruhi instead of just standing around.

"So, what brings you here?" Haruhi asked him.

"America."

-Cue Japan flashback-

"Guys, we should totally visit Ouran Academy!" America cried.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Germany said, "but it could be interesting." Japan nodded.

"America and I will get uniforms for us then." And they all wandered off to get ready.

"So, we're here, in uniforms, now what?"

"We go in, duh!" America yelled, then ran in.

-End flashback-

"Ah, that explains a lot."

"Hey, you know what we need?" Italy said.

"Oh, no, Italy, wait-" a few countries started.

"What?" Tamaki asked. Italy smiled.

"PASTAAAAAAAA~!"


	3. AN THAT MUST BE READ!

So, I have more stories, but does anyone want me to post them? Such as Beyblade, Bakugan, Pokemon, Digimon, Young Justice, Teen Titans, TLoZ, SSB, etc. I also take some requests, more on those in my journal on dA. Please tell me!


	4. AN 2

Hey guys, I'd love it if I got feedback on the other story/ies...Also all of the stories are going to be on hiatus for a while. *dodges flying objects* I CAN EXPLAIN!

So, school started, and I'm having...family issues, plus other random stuff I can't think of becauseIneedtobefinishingmyl itreview. Yeah. So, leave reviews with suggestions, particularly for my new story and Interdimensional Chaos. Thanks!


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